What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

What makes you different?

Do you know what she said mum?

What! how could you do that?

What do you mean son?

What is the best way to keep my vagina clean and fresh?

True - how I loved my mum!

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

My wife always forces me to suck my bulls dick and balls and even Lick his cum from her face and tits and they even humiliate me very badly plus she always talks about big Dicks everywhere everytime and show me pics of huge cocks what should I do ?

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

What’s the best way to get over someone you love?

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

Nvidia Stock Slips. Why It Might Be Entering Its ‘Apple Era’. - Barron's

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”